It's been so long since I've blogged here. There are many reasons for this. The first and most tragic is the loss of Gail. She passed quickly and the town has been scrambling to make up for all of her public contributions. The second and most ridiculous seems to be a sexism that I did not expect because it's coming from some of the women around me. So, I'd like to write about that now.
But first, THE GOOD NEWS!
Just yesterday we had Riverfest. Michelle and I co-chaired this event with a great team. Rain showers came down on us all day but the attendance was better than last year even though the weather was so much worse. We are certain that this is because of all of the artists that graced our five stages. Whatever happens in this town next, I'm going to look at this journey as a great victory. Because on one rainy day, we embraced and paid artists to do the things they do best. And, the sounds of flutes, strings, and percussion permeated the trees, Main Street, it was a dream come true.
I think the admin structure that made this so successful was the intentional collaboration between the Board of Trade (who graciously sponsored most of this event), City Hall (who flawlessly oversaw logistics), and Artists (who gave more sweat equity than should have been required but we just can't control the weather). Terrific success!
Today, I am left with an email from a woman I will call Fracky. I don't why. It just diffuses the ignorance for me, I guess. Here's part of what she wrote:
"For the past few months I have chosen not to react to your misinformed and character assassination emails. And, this will be the first and last time in the spirit of transparency that I will respond. My point of view is that you obviously don’t get what an arts district is; it’s not the production of one endeavor lead by one person. It’s an organic simultaneous movement that will benefit everyone in this town. Guess what! It’s bigger than you and I or anyone else and it will continue to grow above all fears, egos and negativity."
(I refer you to yesterdays event that embraced about 25 different artists/organizations.)
And, this brings me to what's been happening. I have been characterized in such a way by certain women as to be controlling and manipulative and insistent on having things be my way or the highway. This has been their perception I believe because they forget that I am a founder of a business and yes, the interests of my organization are always at the forefront for me. Isn't that how it's supposed to be? Oh yeah, I don't have a penis.
When I began to bring a man in, this was not at all the perception. He was welcomed and his requests were answered briefly and without question.
When I have a request, it is answered with a character judgement. When I have a conversation, it falls on deaf ears. So, I have reached an absolute state of infuriated saturation with this level of ignorance and sexism.
The affirmation of this theory lies in actions.
Scene 1.
During the summer I did everything I could to help with Farmers Market. It began to thrive. But then, I started getting orders from third parties about how to post to Facebook. This is because I was having a blast and posting pix and vid and people were coming based on that. When I didn't know how to perform this request -afterall, I was volunteering my time and simply getting the word out as best as I could- I then had these crazy accusations placed on me. Why wouldn't I do it? Why couldn't I just let the project go? I could. And, I did.
And, the reason I did is because the woman in charge of that project, we'll call her Tacky, took such actions that I have never seen. First, after asking her to not communicate with me anymore electronically and having her send me an electronic smiley face, she conference called me. She then told me the whole town was in the room with her and that everyone thought I was nuts. Did I know that? huh. The next day, she reported a ridiculous claim to the city trying to get me either fined or in trouble. So ODD! I mean, what if she used her powers for good?
End scene.
Scene 2.
This is a long scene. It goes back two years. When a woman we'll just call Fricky decided to "open" an art gallery next to my theatre. Great.
Only, she decided to open her few exhibits per year exactly when I was producing plays. Even though there are months at a time when my company is in rehearsal. No, she thought this will help everyone. Because everyone will love everyone and see everything. Tried that. Nope. Two different audiences. Loud street conversations. Car doors. Drunken laughter. Whatever play I'm producing, these sounds are now a part of the soundscape. And, if I have anything to say about that...we'll I'm just full of fear, ego, and negativity. Obviously.
Problem is, the building is so old there are major noise bleed issues. I've spoken about this for over a year. Other people have spoken about it to Fracky. Fracky has always pretended to sincerely understand. It would require arts management, consideration, understanding. Nothing.
With developers coming in and this level of inconsideration around me, I'm just not sure how wise it will be to continue on with Venus on C Street. But, as I said, I'm so excited about yesterdays event. And, I'm so in love with this town. The obstacles are simply real.
So now, Fricky is busy at her corporate job with benefits and paid vacation and delegates the art gallery to Fracky. The author of the above quotation.
Fracky, is pulled in suddenly after a verbal agreement with Fricky that had nothing to do with Fracky. You see? I know. It's insane. Suffice to say, we were going to bring in a second professional theatre company to C Street but they withdrew because of Fricky and Fracky and the madness that is their whimsy.
So now, I have a brand new play up and running. It's awesome! It's called, Devil Dog Six. And, the playwright is coming in from NYC to see it on Saturday.
Fricky and Fracky have answered my concerns about noise bleed by telling me that they are not having anything amplified and insisting noise bleed is not an issue and more people will come when we do two events at once. (insert the definition of insanity [here]). Voices still travel through the wall. They compromise the sound design of my shows in particular. It would be like me spreading some white out on one of their canvases and saying it blends in with the background anyway.
They make it harder to perform. Take more energy. And, this week in particular we have three shows to do in 26 hours with the writer in house. So, the energy levels are intense.
I have come to the defense of the new work going on at my theatre. And, I have come to the defense of what it would mean to build an arts district using art as the center for economic development.
My company is now producing its 41st script on C Street and has given professional opportunities to hundreds of artists. So, I'm not sure how I'm the problem. Oh yeah, I don't have a penis therefor should shut up and say thank you and lose my intelligence.
Any of the events next door can happen before or after or on dark time. Or, given enough notice, I can schedule around them. But, there is no notice. Their schedule is built on top of my schedule. And, they don't care what impact that has on my Company or my work.
I will rage.
I have dedicated and devoted my life to theatre because theatre has given me my life. And, if that makes people call me names, try to run me out of town with a lynch mob conference call, or accuse me of being dictatorial when all I've done is build, then so be it.
I wonder what these women would do if I walked into their jobs and rearranged their furniture, files, and disrupted their contacts and workflow? I wonder how they would react if I accused them of being negative for having a reaction. You see? I know. It's NUTS!
For the record, all I have tried to do is build art and offer opportunity. You can call me intense. You can call me furious. You can call me empassioned. But, to accuse me of trying to stop art from growing is absurd-especially coming out of the mouths of the people willingly compromising what I have spent 20 years building, 7 of those years on C Street.
Shouldn't be surprised though. Because sexism is insidious. And, when it's coming from women towards women the real crux of the issue is self-hate.
And, I want absolutely nothing to do with that.
There are some basic objectives to pursue and some basic questions to be answered. Painting me as the scapegoating demon woman doesn't do any of this. It diverts the focus, the energy, and the attention. And that diversion may just cost us our district.
That's why I'm writing this. Because there's such opportunity.
Fricky and Fracky took the E out of LADEC. I don't know where they put it. But, everything in art is an exploration for me.
Tacky tried to run me out of down with a conference call.
For some reason, I'm still here.
And, I will definitely rage on and defend my art no matter the accusations of Fricky, Fracky, and Tacky.
I regret nothing. I apologize for nothing. I will build. And, if they destroy I will call them out on it.
Set your clock to it.
And, stay tuned for another installment of the ridiculous obstacle insertions of Fricky, Fracky, and
But first, THE GOOD NEWS!
Just yesterday we had Riverfest. Michelle and I co-chaired this event with a great team. Rain showers came down on us all day but the attendance was better than last year even though the weather was so much worse. We are certain that this is because of all of the artists that graced our five stages. Whatever happens in this town next, I'm going to look at this journey as a great victory. Because on one rainy day, we embraced and paid artists to do the things they do best. And, the sounds of flutes, strings, and percussion permeated the trees, Main Street, it was a dream come true.
I think the admin structure that made this so successful was the intentional collaboration between the Board of Trade (who graciously sponsored most of this event), City Hall (who flawlessly oversaw logistics), and Artists (who gave more sweat equity than should have been required but we just can't control the weather). Terrific success!
Today, I am left with an email from a woman I will call Fracky. I don't why. It just diffuses the ignorance for me, I guess. Here's part of what she wrote:
"For the past few months I have chosen not to react to your misinformed and character assassination emails. And, this will be the first and last time in the spirit of transparency that I will respond. My point of view is that you obviously don’t get what an arts district is; it’s not the production of one endeavor lead by one person. It’s an organic simultaneous movement that will benefit everyone in this town. Guess what! It’s bigger than you and I or anyone else and it will continue to grow above all fears, egos and negativity."
(I refer you to yesterdays event that embraced about 25 different artists/organizations.)
And, this brings me to what's been happening. I have been characterized in such a way by certain women as to be controlling and manipulative and insistent on having things be my way or the highway. This has been their perception I believe because they forget that I am a founder of a business and yes, the interests of my organization are always at the forefront for me. Isn't that how it's supposed to be? Oh yeah, I don't have a penis.
When I began to bring a man in, this was not at all the perception. He was welcomed and his requests were answered briefly and without question.
When I have a request, it is answered with a character judgement. When I have a conversation, it falls on deaf ears. So, I have reached an absolute state of infuriated saturation with this level of ignorance and sexism.
The affirmation of this theory lies in actions.
Scene 1.
During the summer I did everything I could to help with Farmers Market. It began to thrive. But then, I started getting orders from third parties about how to post to Facebook. This is because I was having a blast and posting pix and vid and people were coming based on that. When I didn't know how to perform this request -afterall, I was volunteering my time and simply getting the word out as best as I could- I then had these crazy accusations placed on me. Why wouldn't I do it? Why couldn't I just let the project go? I could. And, I did.
And, the reason I did is because the woman in charge of that project, we'll call her Tacky, took such actions that I have never seen. First, after asking her to not communicate with me anymore electronically and having her send me an electronic smiley face, she conference called me. She then told me the whole town was in the room with her and that everyone thought I was nuts. Did I know that? huh. The next day, she reported a ridiculous claim to the city trying to get me either fined or in trouble. So ODD! I mean, what if she used her powers for good?
End scene.
Scene 2.
This is a long scene. It goes back two years. When a woman we'll just call Fricky decided to "open" an art gallery next to my theatre. Great.
Only, she decided to open her few exhibits per year exactly when I was producing plays. Even though there are months at a time when my company is in rehearsal. No, she thought this will help everyone. Because everyone will love everyone and see everything. Tried that. Nope. Two different audiences. Loud street conversations. Car doors. Drunken laughter. Whatever play I'm producing, these sounds are now a part of the soundscape. And, if I have anything to say about that...we'll I'm just full of fear, ego, and negativity. Obviously.
Problem is, the building is so old there are major noise bleed issues. I've spoken about this for over a year. Other people have spoken about it to Fracky. Fracky has always pretended to sincerely understand. It would require arts management, consideration, understanding. Nothing.
With developers coming in and this level of inconsideration around me, I'm just not sure how wise it will be to continue on with Venus on C Street. But, as I said, I'm so excited about yesterdays event. And, I'm so in love with this town. The obstacles are simply real.
So now, Fricky is busy at her corporate job with benefits and paid vacation and delegates the art gallery to Fracky. The author of the above quotation.
Fracky, is pulled in suddenly after a verbal agreement with Fricky that had nothing to do with Fracky. You see? I know. It's insane. Suffice to say, we were going to bring in a second professional theatre company to C Street but they withdrew because of Fricky and Fracky and the madness that is their whimsy.
So now, I have a brand new play up and running. It's awesome! It's called, Devil Dog Six. And, the playwright is coming in from NYC to see it on Saturday.
Fricky and Fracky have answered my concerns about noise bleed by telling me that they are not having anything amplified and insisting noise bleed is not an issue and more people will come when we do two events at once. (insert the definition of insanity [here]). Voices still travel through the wall. They compromise the sound design of my shows in particular. It would be like me spreading some white out on one of their canvases and saying it blends in with the background anyway.
They make it harder to perform. Take more energy. And, this week in particular we have three shows to do in 26 hours with the writer in house. So, the energy levels are intense.
I have come to the defense of the new work going on at my theatre. And, I have come to the defense of what it would mean to build an arts district using art as the center for economic development.
My company is now producing its 41st script on C Street and has given professional opportunities to hundreds of artists. So, I'm not sure how I'm the problem. Oh yeah, I don't have a penis therefor should shut up and say thank you and lose my intelligence.
Any of the events next door can happen before or after or on dark time. Or, given enough notice, I can schedule around them. But, there is no notice. Their schedule is built on top of my schedule. And, they don't care what impact that has on my Company or my work.
I will rage.
I have dedicated and devoted my life to theatre because theatre has given me my life. And, if that makes people call me names, try to run me out of town with a lynch mob conference call, or accuse me of being dictatorial when all I've done is build, then so be it.
I wonder what these women would do if I walked into their jobs and rearranged their furniture, files, and disrupted their contacts and workflow? I wonder how they would react if I accused them of being negative for having a reaction. You see? I know. It's NUTS!
For the record, all I have tried to do is build art and offer opportunity. You can call me intense. You can call me furious. You can call me empassioned. But, to accuse me of trying to stop art from growing is absurd-especially coming out of the mouths of the people willingly compromising what I have spent 20 years building, 7 of those years on C Street.
Shouldn't be surprised though. Because sexism is insidious. And, when it's coming from women towards women the real crux of the issue is self-hate.
And, I want absolutely nothing to do with that.
There are some basic objectives to pursue and some basic questions to be answered. Painting me as the scapegoating demon woman doesn't do any of this. It diverts the focus, the energy, and the attention. And that diversion may just cost us our district.
That's why I'm writing this. Because there's such opportunity.
Fricky and Fracky took the E out of LADEC. I don't know where they put it. But, everything in art is an exploration for me.
Tacky tried to run me out of down with a conference call.
For some reason, I'm still here.
And, I will definitely rage on and defend my art no matter the accusations of Fricky, Fracky, and Tacky.
I regret nothing. I apologize for nothing. I will build. And, if they destroy I will call them out on it.
Set your clock to it.
And, stay tuned for another installment of the ridiculous obstacle insertions of Fricky, Fracky, and
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